Love Is A War
by nerdyandlovebooks
Summary: "Love is a beautiful thing. But sometimes it destroys us, sometimes it makes us do terrible things. It creates a war in us, but it also mends one. Love is a war itself." Tobias loves a girl named Cecily, until she disappears. He thinks he will never love anyone again until he meets Tris, but Cecily comes back, with a dangerous secret. (AU, No war)
1. Chapter 1

**Hey everyone! I hope you enjoy this fanfiction! I will try to update often. Please review and follow! It is greatly appreciated. Divergent does NOT belong to me, but it does belong to Mrs. Veronica Roth! I am typing on my kindle, so there may be some mistakes.**

**Okay so I am editing these chapters, they are sooooooo bad. You dont have to reread it but my writing right now is pretty crappy, so...**

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**Tobias POV**

(A year before Tris' initiation)

I wake up with the absence of Cecily. I get up, still dazed with sleep. Cecily never gets up early, and when I glance over at the clock, it is only 5:28 AM. Where is she? Panic fills me, as it always does when something unusual happens with Cecily. I guess I am just overprotective.

I look around the small apartment, and there is a small piece of crumpled paper on the bedside table.

_Tobias, I am sorry. I can't tell you where I went or why. Don't look for me. Stay in Dauntless or you will get hurt and if you get hurt looking for me I would never forgive myself. Please. When I say stay in Dauntless I mean it. I will come back someday. I promise._

_I love you,_

_Cece or Cecily_

"No. Nononononono."

Where would she run off too, and not tell me?

Dread fills me and weighs me down like lead, and I don't know what to do. Tears run down my face, but I don't bother to wipe them. I think about Cecily. We knew each other in Abnegation. She knows about my past, Marcus, and she helped me through it. I feel like half of my heart is torn now, like Cece ripped half and ran away with it.

(Present day, a day after Tris and them have picked their jobs.)

It's been over a year, and Cece still hasn't come back. I have lost most of my hope, and even though I love Tris, and she restored most of my happiness and knocked sense into me- some of my soul is still gone with Cecily. I don't even know if she is still alive or not. I shake the thought out of my head, telling myself to stay positive, but the thought has been repeating over and over in my head again, and I can't just dismiss it like it's nothing.

I ask Tris to move into my apartment with me. She nods, with shy smile, and pulls me down for a kiss. I can't think of Cece now, not when Tris is next to me, her eyes alive and bright and strong. I don't know if I will tell Tris; if she would be okay with it or it will break her heart. I shake Cece out of my head for now.

* * *

**Tris POV**

Tobias helps me pack and move things into his apartment. By the time we are done moving and unpacking things in his apartment, I am exhausted, even though I don't have half as much clothes as Christina.

"Geez, how much clothes do you have, Tris?"

I laugh. "Ask Christina. Have you seen how much clothes she has?"

"Nope," he says, popping the 'p'.

"Do you want to finish the rest tomorrow?" I ask.

He nods, and then climbs in bed, while I change into a simple tank top and short to sleep. I climb into bed with him, and he puts his arm around my waist, pulling me closer to him.

"I think I might be in love with you, Tris," he whispers, and I can feel his warm breath on the side of my neck.

"I think I might just be in love with you, too, Tobias." I say back, and I can see him smile.

* * *

I wake up to knocking on the door. I grunt and climbout of bed, swinging the door open grumpily even though my hair is messy and I am in sleeping clothes.

My eyes widen in shock. "Caleb?!" I yell, and then hug him.

"Hi Beatrice," he says quietly.

"What are you doing in the Dauntless compound?"

"I was working and the Erudite wanted me to deliver somethinv here so I decided to ask someone where your apartment is so I could say hi."

"Tris who is it?" Tobias asks from behind.

"Who was that?" Caleb asks

"My boyfriend..?" I ask, trailing off at the end withan innocent smile.

"WHAT? TRIS WHY ARE YOU SLEEPING WITH HIM? YOU ARE NOT MARRIED YET. ARE YOU PREGNANT!?"

"What the hell? Caleb you jump to conclusions way to quickly."

"I'm afraid I will have to tell our parents," Caleb says and storms off quickly.

I close the door, Tobias behind me.

"Sorry about that. He makes stupid conclusions even if he is in Erudite."

Despite that I should be worried that he is going to tell my parents untrue things, when Tobias laughs I laugh with him. He takes a piece of hair and tucks it behind my ear, and then cups my face. I press my lips to his; everytime I kiss him I feel like i'm on fire.

"Are you pregnant?" Tobias says sarcastically.

Despite the joke, my cheeks get warm, and he chuckles.

"We should go eat breakfast," I say, trying to change the subject.

* * *

We walk to the cafeteria with our hands clasped, earning a few stares from people. He asks me about my brother and he keeps making a joke about his conclusions. I sit down next to Tobias, Christina, Will, and Uriah.

Tobias still holds my hand under the table. Uriah comes back with a huge piece of Dauntless cake.

"Your going to eat ALL of that? For breakfast?" Christina says as she gapes at the large piece of cake.

"Hey. Dauntless cake helps me fight," he whines.

"So what's up with the new couple?" Uriah asks, referring to Tobias and I.

"Ummm... I moved in with Four?" I say, not knowing anything else to say.

"Ooh so you guys are sleeping together?" Uriah says, making a weird wiggle motion with his eyebrows, and then winks. Both Tobias and I blush at that, even though I probably blushed a lot more. Christina laughs at the blush on our faces, and so does Uriah, but be stops abruptly as he watches someone. I whip my head around to see who he is looking at.

Someone walks through the cafeteria door, a pretty blond; icy blue eyes and her hair hangs in perfect wavy curls. She is wearing classic dauntless clothes, and she looks at Tobias. She looks scared and breathless, but smiles when she sees him. I look at Tobias but he avoids my eyes and all the color is drained from his face. He drops my hand. I hear him whisper a name under his breath, barely audible.

"Cecily?"

* * *

**So I hope you guys enjoyed that chapter. Its going to be a bloody battle between Cecily and Tris, I can tell you that.**

**Please please please please please please please please review! I would really appreciate it! And by the way, if you got confused, Cece is Cecily's nickname. And I wanted her to look like Alison DiLaurentis (I think I spelled that right?" And I got the name Cecily from Will's sister in The Infernal Devices! :) **


	2. Chapter 2

**New chapter! Be glad! :)**

**EDITING CHAP CUZ MEH WRITING IS SO BAD I HATE IT UGH**

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**Tobias POV**

Someone walks through the door; I see Tris whip her head around. I look behind me, and I see an all too familiar face. I thought she would never come back. My heart stops for a moment.

I let go of Tris' hand, and Cece scans her eyes over the cafeteria until they land on me. Her icy blue eyes are locked with mine, she smiles, but there is coldness in her eyes.

"Cecily?" I say, under my breath.

**Tris POV**

The girl with the icy blue eyes, who I think is Cecily, walks over to our table. Christina looks at her in amazement, Uriah looks at her in shock, like he'd never see her again, and Will looks curious.

"But how-" Tobias starts. Who is this Cecily girl? And how does she know Tobias?

"Thank you for not looking for me." She smiles a warm smile, the way couples do. Jealousy flares inside of me. Were they dating?

"Introduce me to your friends," she says politely.

He gestures to me first. "Tris, my girlfriend," her smile fades instantly at that, and I blush. "Will, Christina," he gestures to them, "And you know Uriah," Tobias says quietly. I glance at him, but he doesn't look at me at all. His eyes are still locked on Cecily.

"To-Four can I talk to you in private please?" Cecily asks.

So she does know his real name.

"Later," he says, his eyes still locked on Cecily's.

"Well I forgot to introduce myself. I'm Cecily, but I go by Cece. I transferred to Dauntless two years ago." She smiles a warm smile, but her eyes are cold.

"Well I am going to go get an apartment," she says, and walks off.

"Umm, I need to talk to her," Tobias says, and I grab his arm, my eyes asking for an explanation. His eyes give me a "later" look. I let him go and he runs after Cecily.

"I'm assuming Four never told you, then." Uriah says.

"Told me about what?"

"Cecily." Uriah replies quietly.

"No, he didn't," I say, with anger in my voice.

"Well Cecily was his girlfriend, a year before you came. She ran away, for an unknown reason, and Four was seriously depressed. Until you came," Uriah smiles a little bit. I know he is trying to make me feel better, but it doesn't really work.

I take all this information in, and I walk back to Tobias' apartment. Tobias isn't in there, but Cecily is, and she's crying. "I thought Tobias was with you," I only say his real name only because I know she knows it. She sits down, leaning against our bed.

"No," she says quietly. "He came after me but I told him I needed time alone."

I nod, knowing what that's like. She pulls out the compartment in the bedside table, and I walk and sit down on the bed. I watch her fingers shake as she pulls out a small, folded, crumpled paper.

"He kept my note," she says quietly, still crying.

She wipes her tears, putting her firm face back on.

"So how do you know his real name?" She asks.

"He took me into his fear simulation, and I used to be in Abnegation too. How about you?" I ask.

"We were in Abnegation together. We were best friends."

Suddenly changing the subject, she says, "You have no idea what I have been through. I have been through a year of torture. And it was painful. I ran away when I got the chance. For Tobias. And now your dating him, and I- my life is in pieces."

I don't know what to say at that. She isn't crying anymore, but her eyes are still slightly red. She stares at the wall pinching her temple, leaning her head against the bed.

"How long have you two been dating?" Cecily asks, changing the subject yet again.

"Since near the end of initiation," I say quietly. I don't ask the same question to her; I don't want to know how long they have dated. Jealousy still pangs inside of my chest.

Why did Tobias never tell me?

Tobias walks through the door. He looks at Cecily first and then at me. He has a troubled look on his face, and I don't know what to say, or explain the situation.

"Tris," he finally says, and I look up. His eyes look tired and weary. "Can I talk to Cecily for a moment? Alone?" He adds. I walk out of the door, not looking at his face or into his eyes. I don't want to cry. I walk to our special spot near the chasm, careful not to slip on the wet, jagged rocks.

Was this their special spot too?

I sit on the rock where Tobias and I first kissed. My thoughts start to overwhelm me with Cecily and Tobias. They could be kissing right now. I shake my head, telling myself I should snap out of it.

I look down at the necklace he gave me, the day the final rankings were showed. It is a dauntless symbol, and on the rim of the circle, it says Tobias & Tris, with an infinity sign.

We might not be infinite anymore. Maybe I am his small infinity; maybe Cecily is his bigger one. **{A/n: see the slight TFIOS reference?}**

I know Tobias comes here often, so I take off my necklace, and put it on one of the rocks, where I know he will find it. It is my message of breaking up. It is obvious he cares for Cecily more. He wouldn't even _look _at me today.

There is a burning sensation in the back of my throat, like I always do before I cry. Then the tears come, and I hope Tobias doesn't come now. I doubt he would, he is probably still talking to _Cecily._

I watch the water, flowing rapidly and spraying water droplets on my clothes. I walk back to Christina's place, not bothering to tell Tobias I am staying there. I am done crying.

I knock on Christina's door, and she opens it.

"Tris?" She asks, surprised.

"Can I stay here for the night?" I ask quietly.

She doesn't ask questions, so I am assuming she knows its about Tobias.

* * *

**Tobias POV**

Cece says she can't explain where she went, or it will be too dangerous. She just keeps saying sorry, and then hugs me. There is still a look of coldness, of hatred in her eyes. She said she went through a whole year of pain- why won't she just tell me where she went?

She cries in my arms, and I am worried. I am worried for Cecily; but I am also worried for Tris; it's been probably an hour and a half and she still hasn't come back yet.

I don't know what to do now; I love Tris but I love Cecily. I can't just take back Cecily now, not when she won't tell me where she has been for the past year and not when I am dating Tris.

**-A few hours later-**

Tris still isn't back yet, so I go to our special spot in the chasm. Cecily is the one who found this spot.

Tris isn't there, but I find something gleaming; it is the necklace I gave her on the final rankings day. She took it off. I don't know what to do. I pick it up, already knowing what the message means.

She thinks I care for Cecily more, and maybe I do.

But I still love Tris, and I start to cry.

So much for being a legendary dauntless guy.

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**HEY PEOPLE of FANFICTION!**

**Yay I updated today! Something interesting in the next chapter.**

**Guys, please don't say " Make Cecily the bad guy," because that's too cliche. (I meab, she may end up being one but that's still cliche.)**

**Yes, this is a Fourtris story, they will end up being together in the end, but most they probably aren't going to be in the beginning.**

**Please pleas please review! Thank you for the few reviewers already! It is greatly appreciated! And so is constructed criticism!**

**Enjoy your day! **


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3**

**Tris POV**

_I walk to Tobias' apartment, wanting to tell him we are breaking up because of Cecily. I knock on the door, but no one opens it. I remember he left a spare key, on top of the doorway. I reach up on my tiptoes, feeling along the edge for it._

_It's not there, but when I try to open the door it's not locked. I turn the knob._

_I shouldn't have._

_I stand there, frozen, my eyes blurring._

_Tobias' hand is around Cecily, his shirt off. They are kissing, and they don't notice me. __Tobias looks confused when he glances at the open door, and be looks around outside. His blue eyes skip over me. I'm invisible to him._

_Do you even exist if no one cares for you? _

_He shuts the door, not caring, going back to whatever he was doing with Cecily._

_I run, as fast as my feet will take me, not knowing where I am going. I finally reach the chasm. I look over the edge. Suicide in Abnegation is selfish. I__ walk close to the jagged, rocky, edge. I take a deep breath, tasting salt in my mouth from my tears. __If I am invisible, if I am just air, would it hurt when I hit the bottom? __I don't care suddenly. I take one last, deep breath, and let myself fall._

_It feels like when I first jumped off the dauntless building._

_The first jumper._

_Tobias' blue eyes._

_Now, my last jump._

_I don't feel anything when I hit the water._

I wake up with a start, gasping. I clutch the sheets, inhaling and exhaling deeply. I put my head in my hands. My face is wet; I must have been crying in my sleep. Christina is still sound asleep on the floor. She let me take the bed.

It was just a dream; I tell this to myself over and over again. I trudge to the bathroom and wash my face, looking at my red, puffy, eyes in the mirror. I am not even near _close _to being as pretty as Cecily. My head pounds. I look at face, the first time I actually make out all the details and imperfections. How does Tobias think I am pretty? Compared to Cecily?

I look and my blue-gray eyes, the only thing that I think is "pretty" on my face. I still look like a twelve year old. I tie my hair up into a ponytail.

"Tris, pull yourself together." I tell myself, that on the count of three, I will let go of the dream.

_One. _Tobias and Cecily kissing.

_Two. _Me running to the chasm.

_Three. _Me jumping into the chasm.

I try to let it go, but it keeps replaying in the back of my mind.

I walk quietly out of Christina's apartment, to the cafeteria. My footsteps echo in the empy hallways, considering it is really early in the morning. I grab something small to eat. I decide to go to the training room, just to throw some knives, thinking it might relieve some of my anger.

I grab a few throwing knives, Tobias' words in my head. Inhale, aim, exhale, fire. I let the knife go, and it makes a thud noise when it hits the board. It lands almost exactly in the middle. _Not bad, actually._

"Nice job," says a voice behind me. I turn around to see Cecily picking up a few knives.

"Thanks," I say.

"So," Cecily says as she walks toward me. "What job did you pick?"

"Leader in training," I reply. I was going to be an ambassador of the factions, but I eventually decided on leader in training.

"Me too. I was already done with training, but I left; so I have to re-train."

I nod. I throw another knife, this time in the exact center.

"Why did you leave, anyway?" I ask, trying not to make my voice shake. For some reason, her aura makes me nervous.

"I can't tell. I fled; i'll tell you that. They might find me again sometime. They may take me away again." She stares at the throwing knife, her eyes getting watery. She sniffs, and then aims. She gets dead center.

We throw in silence.

She is only a few inches taller than me. Once we are done throwing knives, she turns to me, smiling.

"So," she smirks. "Up for a fight?"

I pause, questioning myself whether I should or shouldn't.

"Um, sure, I guess."

We both walk onto the fighting mat. She ties her blond hair up.

She throws the first punch, which I duck. I punch her back, on her side. She grunts, but she doesn't move. She punches me in the stomach, and for a moment I can't breathe. I fall. She pins me, but I kick her off. I punch her nose, and it starts to bleed. I sweep my legs, making her fall. My arm is on her neck pinning her down.

Someone enters the room.

I look up, seing who it is. It's Tobias.

I shouldn't have looked. Cecily takes this opportunity and punches my face, which weakens my pin. She gets up, and I do too. She tries to punch me in the face, but I takd her arm, and twist as hard as I can. She shrieks, and then takes her leg and kicks me in the stomach. I fall, and then she pins me, again. She punches my jaw, and pain races through my face. She punches my nose, so now both of our noses are bleeding. She knees my stomach. My vision blacks at the edges. It takes all of my strength to flip us over. I am dominant now, punching her in the jaw. My knuckles hurt.

"Stop. I can't watch this," Tobias says.

"Then don't," Cecily and I say, synchronized.

Cecily flips us over again, and punches my one more time, and all I can see is darkness.

* * *

I open my eyes, taking in the smell of antiseptic. Will and Christina sit next to me, Marlene hovering over me, replacing bandages. Even Cecily is here. But Tobias isn't.

"Sorry about that," Cecily states.

"It's okay. It was only a fair fight," I say quietly.

She nods, and then gets up and leaves.

"Are you okay?" Christina asks.

"Yup, never felt better," I say sarcastically with a small laugh.

My whole body is sore, and it hurts to move.

"When can I get out of here?" I ask Marlene.

"At least one more day. Sorry Tris," Marlene says.

I nod, drifing off into a sore sleep.

* * *

**Unknown POV**

"Where is she?"

"She is in the Dauntless compound, with Tobias ma'am."

"Well, we need her, and the other girl Beatrice. They would make very good subjects. Them both are very powerful divergents."

"But no matter what, gentlemen, you must get Beatrice Prior. Her genetic pattern is almost 100% perfect. Then we can perfect a Divergent resistant serum, perfect for war."

"Yes ma'am."

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**I hope you guys enjoyed the chapter! :) Please leave reviews and ideas! And did anyone recognize the TID Tessa quote? Lol.**

**D4unt113ss: I pictured her more like an innocent Alison, because Cece looks more like she is in her twenties then 17-18. But imagine Cecily however you like! :)**


	4. Chapter 4

**Listening to the TFIOS soundtrack while writing this :D Anyway, thank you for the reviews! Please keep them going!**

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**Cecily POV**

No one knows.

Except Tobias.

I am not orginally from Abnegation. My mom is Jeanine. I was her lab rat.

She didn't care for me any more than she cared for society. She tortured me, and then sent me away when I was only seven, to a home in Abnegation. Natalie and Andrew Prior took care of me, secretly. They thought I should be hidden from Beatrice and Caleb. They didn't want them, especially Beatrice, to know the cruelty of Erudite. The cruelty of the actual world. Of divergents.

-flashback-

Jeanine shoved me out of the Erudite compound, her skinny fingers clenched tight around my tiny wrist. Tears streaked my face.

She shoved me away. "Go," was all she said. So I went. I ran, as fast as my small legs could take me. Rain poured down, hurting my skin as I ran. I knocked on a plain house door, owned by Abnegation. A woman opened the door, her dirty blond hair in a bun. She gasped at the sight of me.

"Honey, come in. We'll get you dry." She ushered me in. She let me rinse off, and gave me abnegation clothes. She gave me shelter, food, and as much of a home as possible.

And I am thankful for it.

"Um, ma'am, what's your name?" I ask. They questioned me, asked me where I came from, so I think I had a right to ask them for their names.

"Natalie Prior, and my husband, Andrew Prior," she said gesturing to her husband.

A little girl runs into the room, then followed by a boy, a little older but not by much. The girl stops in her tracks, and then stares at me. I fiddle with my fingers nervously. Then the girl runs up to me and hugs me. "FRIEND!" She yells. I laugh, probably the first time I have, really. Maybe I will find hapiness here.

"What's your name?" I ask.

"Beeeaaatrice! What's yours?" She asks with enthusiasm.

I giggle. "Cece" I say, even though my name is Cecily.

"Cece you can be my bestie!" She says.

* * *

Natalie and Andrew gives me a room. I look around. It was small, but I didn't care. I was happy. They signed me up for school, and that's when I met Tobias. I instantly had a crush on him. Later when I grew up, around 14 or so, Tobias told me about his dad. I then told him about my past, about Jeanine. He didn't pity me. He thought I was brave. Later, when I was 15, Beatrice and I were best friends. We did a lot together, even though I did more with Tobias then anyone. Before he went to the choosing ceremony, he stopped by. He held my neck. I was nervous, I didn't know what he was doing. He pressed his lips to mine, and it made me feel warm, like fire was kindling inside of me. I was shocked. I didn't think he liked me that way.

But he left. He chose Dauntless, and I understand; he had to get away from his abusive father. Later that night, Natalie came in. She told me that she had to erase me from Beatrice's and Caleb's mind, because they know of my past, and she thinks it will be better.

I am losing my best friend too.

The day before I left for my choosing ceremony, I watched it happen. They used a advanced version of the memory serum, only erasing me from their minds. They didn't even know what was happening, because they were asleep. I couldn't handle it. I ran, crying. I just lost my best friend. She was like a sister too me. And last year, I lost Tobias too.

I walk to school, slowly. I don't know what factions I'll get. I already know I'm divergent. I sit on the chair, and a Dauntless woman plunges a needle into my neck. I close my eyes. I am used to this, it is what Jeanine did on me for seven years.

* * *

My aptitude results are Erudite and Dauntless. Today I choose, for the rest of my life. I am not going back to Erudite. I would run into my mom again, working for Erudite, working for more pain. Marcus makes a speech at the Choosing Ceremony, about the phrase "faction before blood."

When it is my turn, I take the knife, a run it a little across my palm. I cringe a little, cutting to deep. I clench my hand over the Dauntless bowl, my blood sizzling on the coals.

I am not brave enough to jump first, so I jump second. I look down at the huge hole, looking like it will envelop me into darkness. Tobias could be down there. I step off the ledge, and I fall. I feel weightless, and I also get a thrill in my stomach. Then my body slams onto the net, and for a moment I can't breathe.

I sit up, and someone pulls me over the net.

Tobias.

He stares at me, and I stare back into his blue eyes. He looks older, more mature.

"Name?" He says, even though he already knows it.

"Cecily," I smile.

-end of flashback-

Tris was dating Tobias.

My best friend, my sister.

Dating my ex-boyfriend.

I didn't know who Tris was at first. She matured, a lot, but was still small. She's pretty, anyone can see that if you look at her.

I remember her.

But she doesn't remember me.

My mom threatened me again. She threatened to kill the Prior family, threatened to kill Tobias. That's why I left for two years.

I was surprised that Beatrice chose Dauntless. She was more on the quiet side, except when she was with me, or someone she knew well.

She ranked first in Dauntless, so I assume she is Divergent.

I told her I was Abnegation, which is partially true. But I can't tell her about the past.

Not yet, at least.

* * *

**Hey everone! I hoped you enjoyed the chapter :)**

**The idea of Cece being Jeanine's daughter was Guest 20's idea, so credit to them! Thank you for the amazing idea :)**

**Sorry if this chapter was a little boring, but I thought you guys should know of her past. **

**Have a divergentized day! :)**

**Follow me on insta: trisxeaton**

**Okay bye! **


	5. Chapter 5

**Hey everyone! Thank you for all the awesome reviews. I read every single one of them so please keep them coming!**

**Chapter 5**

**Cecily POV**

I walk slowly to the cafeteria the next morning, needing something to eat. I sit down next to Tris, who sits across from Uriah, Tobias, and another girl that I think is Tris' friend, and a boy that I think the name of is Will.

Tris stares at her food, and so does Tobias.

_Did they break up?_

_Yes, of course they did. They broke up because of you, stupid._

_I did date Tobias first..._

My mind argues back and forth between thoughts, while Uriah chews loudly on his food.

"Uriah, do you have to chew so loud?" Tris and I say at the say time.

"Are you guys like, twins, seperated at birth? You kind of look alike. And to answer you question, yes I do have to chew loudly; it breaks the awkward silence and the fact Tris and Four aren't making eye contact." Uriah states.

Tris and Tobias look at each other, and as soon as they make eye contact, they look away quickly.

"At least I got you guys to look at each other, for like, a second." Uriah says.

"Excuse me," Tris says quietly. She gets up, and starts to walk away. I grab her arm.

"Beatrice, wait," I say. She whips her head around, and stares at me.

Shit. I slipped.

Everyone at the table stares at me with questioning eyes, wondering how I knew her real name.

"How did-" Tris starts.

"Come with me." I say.

I walk to my room, and I can hear her footsteps behind me.

"Close the door please," I say. She waks nervously to close the door and eyes me suspiciouly.

"Chill, I am not going to murder you," I say with a small smile.

"Explain please," is all she says.

I open my mouth, but no words come out. Should I tell her the truth- or come up with an excuse for it?

* * *

**Tris POV**

Only one question repeats in my mind.

How the hell did she know my name?

I study her face, her blonde, curly hair, and her eyes an icy blue.

_"Let's be friends!" I yell as I hug a girl only a little taller then me. She has blonde curls, and hey eyes are icy blue._

_"What's your name?" I ask._

_"Cece!"_

"Cece?" I ask. "Your the little girl that came to our house in Abnegation," I state.

"So they didn't erase all your memories," she mutters.

"What?" I ask.

They erased my memories?

"Look, Beatrice. It's dangerous for me to tell you. And your parents wouldn't want you to know."

"My parents? What does this have to do with my parents?" I'm so confused.

"Your parents took me in after Jeanine kicked me out. Jeanine is my mom. I'm divergent. I don't know my dad. Jeanine tested on me from wheb I was born till I was seven. Your parents were as close to family as I got. You were my best friend, and you knew about my past. When you were 15, and when I was about to choose at the Choosing Ceremony, they used an advanced dosage of the memory serum, to erase me from your memory. To keep you from knowing the cruelty of Erudite, of knowing what divergents are."

I take it all in, and process all the information.

"That's cruel. For them to erase you from my memory."

"It was for your safety," she says quietly.

"It wasn't for my safety. If I knew about that, I would be safer, I would know how to protect myself. Erasing you from my memory was not _safe._" I mutter angrily.

I walk out of Cecily's room, processing everything.

What is the memory serum?

I bump into Tobias, and I look into his eyes. We stare at each other for a moment, and then I look at my feet.

"Sorry," I mutter.

I start to walk away, but he grabs my arm.

"Tris," he says quietly. "Please, can we talk."

I turn around, tears in my eyes.

"About what," my voice shakes.

"Please. Can you go to our spot in the chasm, at 8," he says.

"Our spot," I say, pausing. "Or Cecily's?"

I turn away, not bothering to look back.

* * *

Around eight, I decide I will give him a chance. I walk slowly, wanting to see him, but also dreading the moment. I listen to the rush of water at the chasm.

I stop near "our" spot, and I see Tobias, but I also see Cecily.

And they're kissing.

I watch them for a moment. Her hand is around his neck, and his hand is around her back, pulling her closer. I watch them, and it's beautiful. Then I remember, I remember that he was my boyfriend, the only guy I actually really cared for. And Cecily, who was my best friend.

Just like my dream, he doesn't even notice me. I look at my watch. It's 8:05. Did he mean in the morning? Or is this what he meant to show me? That his old girlfriend is back, that he doesn't care for me anymore, that I am useless and ugly?

Tobias isn't pulling back, and neither is Cecily. One tear escapes the corner of my eye, but that is all I let escape. Tobias turns to look at me, and I start to walk backwards. He opens his mouth to say something, but I stop him.

"Don't say it isn't what it looks like. Because it is _exactly_ what it looks like."

I run up to him, tears streaming down my face, and let myself kiss him one more time. I can tell that he is shocked. It feels natural again, but I pull away and savor the breath that is in between us.

"Goodbye, Tobias," I say, and then I turn away and run.

* * *

**Hello people of fanfiction!**

**I hope you enjoyed this chapter (or maybe you hated it.)**

**Hahahaha cliffhanger! **

**Based on my writing, how old do you think I am?**

**Please please please please leave reviews! I read every single one of them and I enjoy your ideas. I have something evil planned for the next chapter, and you may hate me for it but... you'll see.**

**Pleaaaaaase leave reviews and ideas!**

**Have an awesome summery day! :D**


	6. Chapter 6

**Hello again :)**

**To Dauntlessdivergent46: ZOMG I JUST REALIZED YOU WERE THE WRITER OF ONE OF MY FAV STORIES ON FANFICTION AND I KINDA FREAKED OUT BECAUSE I DIDN'T EVEN NOTICE AND BTW YOUR STORY IS REALLY AWESOME AND YOUR WRITING IS A LOT BETTER THAN MINE. I ALSO LIVE IN TX TOO, AND I'M ALSO ASIAN SO I THINK WE CAN BE TWINS. Lol that was a lot to say.**

**A hint to those who guessed my age:**

**I was 11 when I read Divergent, and when I read it it was popular, but is wasn't near as popular as when the movie came out.**

**(So if your wondering why I write horrible romance scenes, that is because I haven't experienced it in any sort. All though I think I write good drama scenes :P)**

**Okay, enough said. Onto the real story.**

**And to one of the reviewers that asked, I yeah I kinda teared up when I wrote the chapter. And I might cry when I write this one. (Although crying at your own writing is kinda like laughing at your own joke, so does that count as being lame?)**

* * *

**Tris POV**

I run to Christina's apartment, my head down and not looking where I am going. Tears streak my face, and all I can think of is Tobias kissing Cecily.

I knock on Christina's door, and she opens it, surprised.

"Tris? What's wrong?"

She pulls me in for a hug, and I sob silently probably getting her shirt wet.

I take a deep breath, but the scene just replays again and again in my mind, torturing me.

"Tobias," I shake out. "H-he kissed..."

I can't say it.

"That son of a bitch," Christina says angrily.

I don't sleep at all that night, and when I start to, it just comes back to me again and I start crying.

I trusted Tobias.

I loved Tobias.

And the whole time; he loved someone else? And chose to stay with me by default? Because she wasn't available to him?

That's what hurts me the most. That while saying he loved me, he loved someone else, a prettier, braver, girl.

I gave him one more chance. And that chance, he ripped apart into shreds.

I feel so many emotions.

Betrayal, loss, jealousy, hatred, sadness, self-denial.

The dream comes back to me again, jumping into the chasm.

My nightmare has come true.

_Your better than this, Tris._

My legs beg to differ.

I'm not better than this. I'm really not. I'm not as brave as Cecily, as strong or smart or beautiful.

I can see what Tobias sees in her.

I don't know what Tobias saw in me.

I walk silently out of Christina's apartment, and I walk to the chasm.

I look at the drop, the water rushing violently over the rocks.

Is this what Al felt like? Completely rejected?

I hear someone's footsteps behind me.

"TRIS NO!"

Christina.

Before she can stop me, I step off.

I feel weightless, and then the impact jostles me.

This time I can feel the pain when I hit the bottom, but it is _nothing _compared to the pain I felt when I saw Tobias and Cecily kiss.

I hear Christina make a blood curdling scream, and then darkness consumes me as I close my eyes.

* * *

**Tobias POV**

(After Tris leaves Tobias and Cecily)

I can't believe what I just did. I don't look at Cecily, and I turn and walk away back to my apartment.

Then the tears come.

"What the hell have you done, Tobias? What have you done?" I murmur to myself.

I broke my chance with Tris.

-a few hours later-

I can't sleep, and I stare at the ceiling.

What does Tris possibly think of me now?

I hear a loud scream, one that belongs to Christina. I sit up in my bed, and when I open the door, Christina stands outside it.

Her face is red, and her eyes are puffy from crying.

"You selfish asshole!" She screams, and then falls to her knees.

"What happened?"

"What the hell do you think, FOUR?"

At that, Cecily comes out of her apartment.

"What's going on?" She says as she rubs her eyes.

"T-tris. Th-the chasm." She says, and she starts to cry.

What have I done?

I break out in a sprint, heading toward the chasm.

I see a pale, lifeless body. Blood rushes from a gush on her head. Her blond hair is spread around her head.

Tris.

"Tris!" I yell.

I grasp the jagged, rocky wall for support, and everything starts to spin.

Marlene hovers over her. I run over, pulling her fragile body into my lap.

Marlene uses her stethoscope and holds it over Tris' chest.

"Oh my God," Cecily says from behind me as she looks at the scene.

My tears drop on Tris' face. My shaky fingers run through her hair.

Marlene covers her mouth with her hand.

"Her heart rate is dropping. Get her to the infirmary. Now!" She demands, and I can tell she is trying not to cry.

I pick her up, and I run as fast as I can.

"Tris," I whisper. "Please, please hold on."

What have I done?

Blood covers my hand.

This is all your damn fault Tobias.

I hand her to a doctor, and they rush her into another room.

I try to enter.

"Immediate family only,"

I want to say I'm her boyfriend, but I'm not.

The nurse comes in.

"She's in a coma. She's barely holding on. I'm sorry, we don't know if she'll live."

"Is that all you can do?!" I yell.

"Sir, please calm down. And yes, i'm afraid so. Now it's her choice whether she lives or not."

Once the nurse leaves, I sneak into Tris' room.

I sit on one of the guest chairs, and I take Tris' hand.

It's cold.

"Tris," I say. I stary to tear up again. It looks like she's sleeping, that she could wake up.

"Tris!" I say louder.

"Please, please hold on. I can't bare to see you die. I blame myself all for this. What have I done? I'm so sorry. I love you, I really do, and I am so so sorry." I choke. "Please, if your in there, please wake up."

I'm still holding her hand. I put my head against the infirmary bed, and I cry.

I will never forgive myself for this.

I kiss her, expecting, like in old movies, for her to wake up. For her to love me again, say it's okay.

But it isn't. And it's all of my fault.

The nurse comes in again and kicks me out. All that is on my my mind is Tris.

I walk out of the dauntless compound, and head toward the ferris wheel.

"Please forgive me, Tris," I murmur.

All I can think about is her smile, her warm eyes when she climbed the ferris wheel with me.

I break down again.

* * *

**Jeanine POV**

I look into Beatrice's room, and I unhook her from her machines. I shoot the nurse, and my men carry her.

My daughter just came back, I guess i'll give her a break.

It's Beatrice's turn.

**Tobias' POV**

I wake up with a terrible headache, and someone knocks on the door. It's Christina, and she has a panicked look that worries me.

"It's Tris," she says, breathless.

"She's missing."

* * *

**Mwahahahaha am I evil? I left you guys at a cliffhanger again.**

**Please please please give reviews and ideas! Your lucky; two updates in one day! :)**

**Did you see the If I Stay references? **

**Did you cry?**

**Please review! :)**

**Have an awesome day/night! **


	7. Chapter 7

**Hey guys. Sorry for not updating in a little while, but I have a few ideas :) Tonight my family is going to watch Divergent, (everyone has except for my dad, even my mom watched it because she read the trilogy and I kinda don't want him to watch because of Tris' fear landscape... lol. Anyway, again, sorry for not updating in so long. I deleted my other stories, because I really, really want to finish this one. I didn't delete the files yet, so if I finish this story then I can re-upload and edit them. Sorry for the long authors note! Cheers for you if you read it all :)**

* * *

**Cecily POV**

It's all my freaking fault. All of it. I kissed Tobias.

I didn't know that Tris and Tobias were meeting near the chasm. I just went there to clear my head. I saw Tobias there, and since I didn't know Tris was coming, I sat down next to him, talking. I leaned into him; and we kissed. More like _I_ kissed him. He didn't even kiss back. I don't blame him, I disappear, come back and don't even explain. When we broke apart, Tris was standing there, her arms crossed and tears forming in her eyes.

And her face _broke _me.

I walk to Tobias' apartment, because I wanted to talk things out. He opens the door when after I knock, and his eyes are slightly red and puffy. He's been crying; of course he has.

This is all my fault.

He looks at me, and I open my mouth to say something; but nothing comes out.

"Cecily," he says, his voice withered. "I need some time alone."

He starts to close the door, but I hold it open. "Tobias, wait." I say, hoping he will listen.

"What?" He says irritated.

"I have a feeling I know where Tris is."

**Sorry it's really short! I'll try to update soon, though. I kinda just like the suspense of a cliffhanger, so... I left off there. Again, sorry it's short, but at least its something!**


	8. Chapter 8

**Hey people of fanfiction! I'm really sorry I haven't updated in a few weeks. I vacation for two weeks and I just got back today, and we were in Yellowstone so the internet was bad and I spent my time updating my collaborative story (The Heart Stealer) it has two chapters up so far, so please read it. I would appreciate it if you did! :)**

**To a guest that reviewed: Yes, I know that it is pretty much equally Tobias' fault. I just wanted to explain a little bit, and basically say that Cecily isn't bad, she feels guilty. Tris definitely isn't going to forgive Tobias right away. Or Cecily. **

* * *

**Chapter 8**

**Cecily POV**

"_I have a feeling I know where Tris is."_

Tobias opens the door, his eyes now alert. He steps out of the door and raises his eyebrows as if to say, _"continue..."_

"Remember when I said... when I said that Jeanine was my mom and tortured me untill I was seven?" I ask quietly, knowing the cameras in the Dauntless compound can pick up sound really well, and knowing that the footage from the cameras are also sent to Erudite.

He nods, leaning against the doorway. I continue.

"The past two years... that's where I was. She tortured me again. And when I was there, she was talking about Tris. Which, even though I lived in the same house as her, you never seemed to notice. Anyway, you have access to the computer labs, right? I guarantee that there was a security camera in the room. If we can access the footage, and if Jeanine is in the video; then my guess would be right."

He pinches the bridge of his nose, processing the information I just said.

"Let's go," he says in a firm tone, a tone that I recognize; one that means there will be no changing his mind. He shuts the door of his apartment and we half-run to the computer labs. Tobias opens the door, and leans over the desk of which a computer sits on.

He taps the screen, entering passwords. I stare at the screen as it changes, numbers and letters appearing and more and more passwords.

"Shit," Tobias breathes.

"What?"

"I don't remember the number of the room that she was in," he sighs, resting his chin on his hand. I never visited Tris; but I do remember someone talking about a girl who jumped into the chasm- room 46.

"Try room 46."

He doesn't look at me questioningly, he just types in the numbers and the security footage pops up. There is no sound, and nothing happens for the first five minutes. I squint at the bright screen in the dark room. My eyes are heavy from the lack of sleep, but I know I have to keep my eyes open.

Then it happens. Jeanine enters the room with a gun, shooting the nurse tending to Tris' wounds. Two of her henchmen come in after her; and she quickly unhooks her from the machines. Her men carry her out of the room, roughly.

Bingo.

I feel small triumph within me, but this fight hasn't even started. The Erudite compound is huge, containing over 50 floors, and who knows how many rooms each. If I could guess where they hid Tris, I would think in Jeanine's laboratory, which is in the top floor with extreme security measures. We would both be risking our lives to save hers, but her parents saved mine. I would be nowhere without them.

Tobias and I devise a plan. We will sneak into the Erudite compound in the middle of the night, taking on Jeanine's laboratory first, then if she is not there we will slowly descend and check the buildings. We make sure are plan is foolproof, but if you are entering a building with Erudite, it has to be more than foolproof. It has to be perfect, calculated. And we can't make that happen. Not with all the cameras, especially with extreme security measures; there will not be enough time.

I guess we just have to make a distraction.

And what better distraction than to vaporize Erudite's water with Dauntless' fire?

* * *

**Sorry this is a bit short, but hopefully it will do until the next chapter.**

**Please please please please pretty please please please please please please please please please please please please please please PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE review! Also give ideas! And did you guys get the last part or was it kind of confusing? ****I'll leave that for you guys to infer what their distraction is.**

**Have an awesome day/night!**

**And please read 'The Heart Stealer' by Erica and I! :)**


	9. Chapter 9

**Hey guys. I am slowly losing insterest in this story. Thank you to the few people who review, you guys are the ones who continue to motivate me to write new chapters. I don't really know which direction to take this story, because it could go many ways.**

**Anyway, school is starting in a week, and I would just like to say that I might not update frequently. I will try to squeeze in a few chapters before school starts. I also got a new puppy named Toby (Tobias) and I continuously have to watch him every day, and the only free time I have is when he naps.**

**Sorry for the really boring authors note! If you read the whole thing, yay for you!**

* * *

**Tobias POV**

Cecily walks out shortly after, leaving me alone in the computer room. I walk slowly back to my apartment, making time seem to tick faster. My thoughts slowly drift off to Tris. Memories of her. I rub my eyes, even though it is only around eight at night I feel tired. I tread my way into the apartment, and plop down in my bed. I stare at the ceiling, feeling empty.

Empty of _her _prescence, to be specific.

I should have pushed Cecily away. I knew Tris was coming, and I didn't push her away. I clench my fists around the bed sheet, cringing at the memory. But I couldn't. Cecily was absent in my heart for a long time, and it felt right.

But oh, it was _so _wrong.

I have the same feeling that I did when Cecily disappeared. Emptiness. Except this time, I caused that emptiness. I was the cause, and she was the effect.

When I first started liking Tris, I thought that I wouldn't actually _love_ her. I thought she was my rebound, but she ended up becoming more than that. And at some points, I forgot about Cecily. At some points, I liked her qualities _more _than Cecily. And I know now that she wasn't just a girl I dated just because Cecily wasn't available to me. I did date those girls. The ones that Zeke set me up with.

But Tris isn't one of those girls.

I'm mad at Cecily. Mostly me, but she did ignite the kiss. She didn't know Tris was coming, but she did know that Tris and I just broke up, and she knew that I wanted space. I know I still shouldn't be blaming it on her, but it lifts weight off my chest knowing it wasn't fully my fault. And to some point, sometimes I wonder if Cecily did that on purpose. She could have heard that Tris was meeting me.

I know Cecily wouldn't do that, but sometimes I wonder. She's a leader in training, she has access to all of the security cameras.

I try to clear my mind and fall asleep. I glance at the clock, and it reads 8:54. I sigh with frustration and drowsiness, letting my mind drift.

* * *

The loud, annoying beep of the alarm clock makes me snap my eyes open. I blink a few times to get the sleep out of my eyes. I glance at the clock.

**2:30 A.M.**

I grab the gun in the corner of my room, picking up an Erudite device that causes fire, and jog to Cecily's apartment. I only knock once, and she opens it, ready. Gun in hand, we walk toward the exit quickly.

I walk out and the crisp midnight air greets me as a train screeches by.

"Fourth car down!" I yell to Cecily as she nods. I easily pull myself into the fourth car, and I grab Cecily's hand to help her up. She nods, as if to say 'thank you'. We ride towards the Erudite compound in silence, listening to the quiet sounds of nature outside. We don't talk to each other, and we barely even acknowledge one another.

We near the Erudite building, and Cecily jumps out first, followed by me. Adrenaline pulses through me and I don't feel any pain as my feet meet the ground, like it did when I first came to Dauntless. I jog quickly behind her, my heart beating with anticipation. We walk through the front door, greeted by a few gaurds who are asleep.

I glance over the room, my eyes resting on a few doors; what I recognize is an elevator. They don't have these in Dauntless. I press the up button on the elevator, and the door slides open, and Cecily and I step in. I click the number of the top floor.

Jeanine's laboratory first.

The elevator makes a small 'ding' sound. The doors slide open with ease, and we step out.

"I'll take right," I say quietly to Cecily. She nods, heading the other direction. I walk through the small hallway, passing doorways with windows. Cupping my hands to the glass to block the glare, peeping into each window, none of which occupy Tris. Eventually I reach a dead end, and I walk back the other way, heading back to the left. Cecily isn't back yet, so I decide to search for her to see if she needs help.

Small hope makes my heart beat faster. What is she found Tris?

I find Cecily in the third door down. I can only see her back.

Then I see _her_ body, on the steel table in front of her. I can't tell if she's awake or not. I try to open the door, but it's locked. I pound on the door, hoping to get Cecily's attention. Instead I get Tris'.

She looks at me. There are tears on her face. She's trashing, and her hands and legs are tied together. She has tape around her head to keep her mouth shut.

"CECILY!" I yell. I shoot the glass, unlocking it from the inside.

Cecily finally turns around. Her eyes glassy and cold. Before she left, her eyes we're always warm.

Now they are the eyes of someone's she's not. The eyes of an empty, emotionless person.

She pulls out her gun. Gaurds pin my arms, knocking the gun out of my hand. I try to escape their hands, but there are too many gaurds. Jeanine walks out of a small door, a sly smirk playing on her lips, and she nods to Cecily.

I hear a bang and a blood curdling scream.

I don't feel pain, because I am not the one she shot.

She shot _Tris._

* * *

**Cliffy!**

**I know Cecily isn't making sense right now, especially since she seemed so innocent in the chapters of her POV. I**** will explain soon, if you couldn't infer what happened to Cecily already.**

**Please leave reviews, ideas, and etc.! I really like this chapter... may be my favorite so far! AND, do you think Cecily is good or bad now? Or both? Or if you think you know what is up with her... review or PM me; I may give you a hint. Hehe.**

**Byeeeee!**


	10. Chapter 10

**A/N: AAARGH IM SO SORRY FOR NOT UPDATING IN THREE FREAKING WEEKS! I HAVE COME UP WITH A SCHEDULE: I WILL TRY TO ATLEAST UPDATE EVERY SUNDAY (WHICH MEANS YOU GUYS MIGHT GET A NEW CHAP ON SUNDAY) ANYWAY I STARTED SCHOOL BUT MOSTLY THE REASON I WASN'T UPDATING WAS WRITERS BLOCK AND LAZINESS SORRY! :( if you are still reading this story, I applaud you and give you an award for patience!**

**Chapter 10**

**Tobias POV**

She shot Tris.

_She shot Tris._

_Cecily _shot Tris.

The thought consumes my mind. I don't fight the gaurds that are walking me away, who might take me to my execution. I am too schocked. Someone i've known since I was in Abnegation, someone i've trusted with my past, betraying me? Or more so, betraying Tris? What are her motives? Why?

Why Cecily?

My shock turns to fear; what happened to Tris? What if she is dead? Where did Cecily even shoot her?

Then it turns to rage. I grunt in anger is I bring my elbow to one of the faces behind me, knocking their jaw. Hands release me and I turn around, my arm connecting with the gaurd I hit a second ago, and I swiftly hold him in a lock as I grab his gun. I shoot him, and I hit the end of the small handgun against the other gaurds' head, knocking them out, buying me enough time.

I run through the hallway that they dragged me into, and there is a passcode on the wall. I guess the code that is shared with all of the security systems in Chicago, but it doesn't work and it sets off the alarm. Shit.

The light in the hallway blinks a bright red, and I hear yells and footsteps nearing me.

I don't have enough time.

I check the nearest door on the left. It isn't locked, so I push it open with the gun hugged to my chest. I close it as someone approaches. He has a long blue coat and he looks a lot like Tris, and he isn't muscular so I could use him without him fighting me.

I open the door silently, pulling out the gun behind his head, and I tug on his arm roughly, almost tossing him into the closet. Fear is plastered over his face, and I pull him down as the other guards come so they don't see us through the window.

"What's your name?" I ask sternly, but quietly.

"C-caleb. Caleb Prior," he answers hesitantly.

Prior.

"Tris' brother?" I question.

He nods, his face still showing fear.

"Your sister is in danger, Caleb." He raises his eyebrows, then his mouth curls into a frown of anger.

"What did you do to her?" He asks through gritted teeth as he grabs my arm.

"Me? Are you stupid? Care to question why the hell i'm at Erudite in the first place? Why don't you question your leader?" I say, trying not to raise my voice.

"What? Jeanine? No way." He says as he shakes his head. "She wouldn't do that."

"Well, she did. So do you want to save your sister or stay here while doing nothing at all?"

He gets up right away, and I peek through the small window to make sure the gaurds are gone.

"Follow me," I whisper.

* * *

"How do you know my sister anyway?" Caleb asks quietly once we are alone in the hallways. I decide I shouldn't tell him that the reason Tris is here is kind of my fault, so I decide to stick with, "I was her instructor."

I make it down the hallway where they dragged me, trying to remember what direction they took Tris. I look through all the doors again, but she's not there. I stop at the last room, where there is a dim light. I look through the window.

Tris.

She is lying on a steel table, blood surrounding her hair, her bare body where she is almost naked. There are scratches on her arms, and she is hooked up to something I know as a heart monitor. I don't know what it means, but there is a straight line.

Does that mean she is alive? Or dead? I don't want to know.

"Caleb, she's here." I whisper.

He doesn't look through the window, he immediately tries to open the door. It stays locked, and the glass is probably bulletproof. Even if it wasn't, it would cause alarm in me trying.

There is no lock on the door, which means there is a different way to unlock the door. I look around the door, only to find a small keypad.

It's worth a shot.

Even if I get taken away, and die, it was for Tris. And I would die for her.

I enter the same four digits in the other door. It doesn't work, and the alarms go off again. Red light flashes in my eye and I try to focus. Caleb starts to panic as gaurds approach us.

"Does she have a daughter? Try a birthday or something!" He yells.

Daughter. Cecily.

It makes sense.

I type in 0820. Her birthday was August 20th.

The keypad lights up a bright green color, making a click sound. I open the door quickly as Caleb pushes past me. I shut the door right before the guards get there.

Caleb has a panicked looked in his face as he sees the amount of blood loss and the heart monitor. Caleb goes pale as he lightly touches Tris wrist, and there is a complete moment of silence. I don't know what he is doing.

"No. No no no no no!"

Fear is written all over my face as my heart beats quickly and a pit envelopes in my stomach.

"What?" I say, breathless.

Caleb puts his head down, tears forming in his gray eyes.

"She's dead."

* * *

**THIS CHAPTER IS NOT EDITED! SORRY IF ITS BAD. HOPE Y'ALL ENJOY! **

**I PLAN FOR THIS STORY TO HAVE AROUND 20 CHAPTERS MAYBE MORE OR MAYBE LESS, IDK.**

**PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE REVIEW, FOLLOW, AND FAVORITE!**

**HAVE A GREAT DAY/NIGHT!**

**-mel**


	11. Chapter 11

**A/N: NEW CHAPTER. YAY FOR FREQUENT UPDATES! I SHOULD ACTUALLY BE STUDYING FOR A HISTORY TEST... BUT I THINK I'M MOSTLY PREPARED SO HERE YA GO GUYS. AND I THINK A LOT OF PEOPLE STOPPED READING, EITHER THAT, OR PEOPLE DON'T WRITE REVEIWS ANYMORE.**

**Chapter 11 {Not Edited}**

**Tobias POV**

Dead.

One word that can change your whole life.

D-e-a-d.

I stay still, while Caleb moves around the room gathering things for who knows what. My eyes blurry from tears, I force myself to move toward Tris. I grasp her hand, once warm and reassuring, now cold and fragile.

It's funny how i'm crying over a choice I made. Rather, a choice I didn't make. If I would have just pushed Cecily away, this would have never happened. But if I did push her away- what would've happened to Cecily?

Where is she anyway?

Tears wet my face but I don't bother to wipe them away. I put my forehead against the cold table, thinking what would have happened if Tris chose to stay in Abnegation. Would I would've done what she did; trying to take my own life because Cecily was absent from it?

I realize this now: Love is a beautiful thing. It can be. But sometimes it destroys us, sometimes it makes us do terrible things. Suicidal things. It creates a war within us, but sometimes it mends a war. Love is a war itself. You have to fight for it.

I look up from the table to see Caleb pouring a clear liquid into a vial, whitch turns the vial a translucent sky blue.

"What are you going to with that?" I ask Caleb.

"Well, while you were wheeping over my sister, I had an idea. But we don't have much time, and I need you to help." He says while he kneels down to measure out something.

I nod, making a hand gesture for him to continue whatever he was talking about.

"I'm part of the Resurgent group at Erudite," He states. Resurgent? What the hell does that mean?

He sees the confusion on my face, and says, "Resurgent. Adjective. Increasing or reviving after a period of little activity," he says quietly while focusing on the vial.

"Anyway," he sighs, "they have been working on a new serum for a while. They found one, and it works. Basically, if the person has not been dead for over 12 hours, they can be revived. I just happen to be one of the most trusted students, and they showed me uow to make it. We're still working on using it on people who have been dead longer, though."

As he says this, my heart races with excitement. This means we could get Tris back. I could get Tris back.

* * *

"Done!" Caleb says enthusiastically with a smile on his face. You can still see the worry in his eyes. The same worry that I have. The worry that this might not work, and Tris might not come back to life.

By now, all the guards have left. They didn't see us come in this room, so they shouldn't know we are here. But we need to hurry, someone might have seen the security camera footage.

Sleep tugs at my eyes, but the nervousness takes over my body, keeping me awake and alert.

Caleb puts the liquid from the small vial in a cylindrical glass, then puts it into a syringe. The needle looks approximately two inches in height.

"Here," Caleb says, the syringe outstretched in his hand. His hand is terribly shaky.

"Insert it in her neck, it doesn't matter where," Caleb looks at the syringe to her neck.

I hold Tris' small, cold hand in mine, and I plunge the needle into her neck. I wait a minute.

Nothing happens.

I exhale deeply. I gave hope in something that didn't work. But if the serum is supposed to work within 12 hours, we wouldn't have time to make another one. It is almost morning, and Jeanine might come back if we don't hurry.

But then- something.

Her eyes open, and suddenly there is a steady beat to the heart monitor. Caleb smiles, triumphant, and he runs over to the table.

Tris tries to sit up, but clutches her bullet wound. She grits her teeth in pain, holding back a scream.

"Tobias," she breathes, then smiles.

Then she does something I didn't expect; she kisses me. Does she remember that I kissed Cecily?

She smiles, then says, "I need to talk to you. Later." She says it in a serious tone, one that means "I know something."

I help Tris sit up. We have to get her out. Now.

"Caleb, you need to carry Tris. We have to get out, if we don't want to get caught by Jeanine," I tell him.

He nods in response, and as he tries to lift her up, someone opens the door.

Jeanine.

"Caleb, run! Get her the hell out of here!" I yell.

Jeanine smirks as Cecily steps out from behind her. She hoists a gun, pointed at me. She puts her finger on the trigger.

I run at her, hoping to knock the gun oit of her hand. She pulls the trigger, but instead of shooting at me, I twist her arm, and she shoots Jeanine in the waist. It won't kill her, but it will give us enough time to escape.

Cecily collapses, and I pick her up. She's not shot. What the hell?

I run, as fast as my feet can carry Cecily and my weight. I take the stairs to avoid people, and I inhale and exhale deeply, my lungs burning as I run down the last few flights of stairs.

I hope Caleb and Tris got out already.

I run out the fire exit. I look down at Cecily; she opens her eyes, whispers something, then falls back into her state.

I look around for Caleb and Tris, and they emerge from the front entrance. Caleb looks confused at me holding Cecily, and I gesture for him to keep running towards the train.

I jog as the train nears. I throw Cecily on first, pulling myself in after. I pull in Tris, and Caleb hauls himself in.

Tris leans against me, away from Caleb and sleeping Cecily.

"What happened to her?" Tris says as she pointed to Cecily.

"I don't know, she fainted somehow." I state.

There is just silence between me and Tris, then I break it.

"Why did you kiss me?" I ask her. "I kissed Cecily. And I didn't push her away," I say, looking directly in her eyes.

"Because, even though I won't fully forgive you; I did somewhat. I jumped into the chasm because I thought you only loved her. That you didn't love me at all. But I was wrong, I know you love me. You proved that today." She says quietly.

"How?" I ask.

"You risked your life to save mine," she says and smiles.

"And I understand...if you still choose Cecily. Over me. And I think I know what happened to her."

"What do you think happened?" I ask. What could've happened?

"Before she shot me, she looked scared. Not in her face, but her eyes. I could tell. She was resisting as much as she could, but it was too strong. So she shot me."

"You mean she was under a serum?"

She nods. "One that worked on the Divergent. I guess somehow Jeanine created one."

Silence overcomes us again, and Tris leans her head on my shoulder. She looks out the train window, where the sun is rising. I'll take all the peace I can get, but now that Jeanine found a serum that will control Divergent; what will happen?

* * *

**HEY SO I CHANGED THE ENDING OF THIS CHAPTER IF YOU COULDN'T TELL. THE OTHER ONE WAS RUSHED. BUT NOW THAT THE STORY IS NOT OVER, WHAT DO YOU WANT TO HAPPEN NEXT? PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PM OR REVIEW IDEAS BECAUSE IF NOT, I MIGHT NOT UPDATE THAT QUICKLY! **

**BYESSS**

**HAVE A GREAT DAY PEEPS**


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